2.11.2008

judgement, flowers, and diamonds

As you may have noticed, my banner has changed to reflect the Valentine's Day holiday. I'm not a big follower of Valentine's Day fanfare, as some of my friends are. I celebrate Valentine's Day for Kristen, because it is her favorite holiday, whether she is single or coupled. Perhaps it is because she is more of a romantic than I. Or it could be her uncontrollable addiction to Brach's candy hearts.

I see it as more of a judgement day than a holiday. I actually found that I liked V-day more when I was single. When you are single, you don't get the invasive questions about what your other is going to do for you on Valentine's Day. People leave you alone, or you get even more goodies from friends because you are single and they don't think you'll be getting any love from anyone else. When you are coupled, people look at your empty work desk and ask probing questions like, "aren't you going to get flowers today?" or make a rude statement like "I guess someone forgot it was Valentine's Day." To be honest, I don't like receiving flowers. They will wilt and die. I don't care for chocolates. I prefer something more sustainable. People don't seem to understand that I would rather receive a potted plant than a flower.

Another V-day staple seems to be jewelry. And most women want diamonds. I don't see what all the fuss is about. pssst...it is a rock...from the ground. (And not to mention that someone in Africa may have been killed or abused when trying to mine the 1 karat stone on your ring finger that your other probably spent a month's salary to give you.) I don't like diamonds. They look like glass. When you really think about it, glass would make more sense than a diamond, given that people often justify the expenditure of diamonds by the symbolic nature of the stone. Diamonds are hard, they last forever. Glass is neither liquid, nor solid and it is easily broken, just like a relationship. Similarly, you can't define a relationship and one wrong move and you may break it forever. Relationships, like glass, take care to maintain. I like that symbolism better than the hard, unchanging diamond.

So, I doubt that Valentine's Day will be anything spectacular. I'm sure it will feel like any other day. I may be odd, but I don't celebrate anniversaries either. To be honest, the man and I don't have an anniversary and don't really know when we officially started dating. I guess all that sentimentality is lost on me.

But, if you still really want to woo me, office supplies may be a better choice.

1 comment:

Ms. Jane said...

I like the new look of your blog. So pink. It makes me want to run out and buy a bag of Brachs candies (which I have given up for lent - boo hoo). I love Valentine's Day. I wish I could celebrate with my Conversation Hearts, but I will find some other way to show myself love. I am glad someone can dislike diamonds, because it cannot be me. I feel terrible about the people in Africa, but some poor little kids in sweat shops probably made at least SOME of the things you own, so chew on THAT. Ha. My love of diamonds (and REAL jewelry, platinum please) is because of the significance behind it. Perhaps you have a man in your life who is very good at making you feel loved on a regular basis. If that is true, lucky you. For the rest of us, when our "man" is too busy or preoccupied to lavish intangible affections on us, we can look at the twinkles on our ears, necks and/or fingers and remember - "he DOES care." Now, if the man is RICH, this is no necessarily true. Most modest to slightly above-average income guys feel the same way you do about jewelry - it is a waste of money. That's why the fact that they DO spend that chunk of ca-ching on us, a chunk that they would rather spend on something else more practical, it means a lot. And 'forever' is a romantic concept. That is what a diamond conveys. Forever love. It does not describe the malleability of the relationship. I may have to write a counter blog to your blog :-) But you know me, I am a lover not a fighter. Mwah! I love you!