9.13.2006

"two balls short of a pair" or "one fewer man in the house"

It has been a whirlwind month. The man's grandfather passed away in August. I celebrated my quarter-century birthday August 30. My thesis chapter was due the first of September. Jack had his testes removed on September 5.

I was quite worried about the nut extraction that was to be performed on my beloved Jack. Was he ever going to forgive me for allowing someone to cut out his man parts? Alas, he did. He came home and acted as though nothing had ever happened. Cat normalcy has resumed and all is well in Jack's world. BUT...Jammer is having a horrible time these days. Her separation anxiety has morphed into a complete jealousy of anything and everything. The dog gets jealous when the man so much as leans in my direction and if anyone even thinks about the cat, she mauls them with her neediness. She has also begun to shed tumbleweeds, not just a few hairs here or there, but bundled tumbleweeds of Jammer-hair. We've been brushing her daily and each day we end up with enough discarded hair to form another canine. A BIG canine. A great dane amount of canine. I'm not sure what sparked this phenomenon. I am guessing that it all stems from when she saw me take Jack away to the vet and NOT COME HOME WITH HIM. Below is the mental dialogue of Jammer the Dog after I returned without the Cat Named Jack:

Tuesday, September 5
8:45 AM: "Trish is home. Trish is home. Trish is home."

8:50 AM: "Where's that evil usurper, that feline bastard that steals my much-deserved attention? I don't see him. Where is he?!? I smell him on her clothes but don't see him."

9:00 AM: "The cat is gone! THE CAT IS GONE! I AM AN ONLY QUADRAPED ONCE AGAIN! THE PEOPLE HAVE COME TO THEIR SENSES!!"

2:45 PM: "Why do the people keep talking about that wretched little beast. He is gone. They need to get over it. I have."

3:00 PM: "Trish is leaving, I want to go for a ride. I want to go for a ride in the car. I WANT TO GO FOR A RIDE! Damnit, she left without me."

3:30 PM: "Trish is home. Trish is home. Trish is home."

3:31 PM: "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? WHAT THE HELL IS THAT LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT DOING BACK HERE? HE WAS GONE? WHY DID THEY BRING HIM BACK? I HATE HIM!!!"

3:32 PM: "I'll show the people...they'll rue the day that they brought that bundle of cat filth back into this house."