why the man's parents seem to like me better

  1. they don't have a daughter of their own
  2. they never had to wipe my ass
  3. they've never seen me throw a tantrum
  4. they didn't know me during my annoying, adolescent angsty years
  5. they don't look at me and see a resemblance to his estranged father
  6. they buy me presents and are nice to me so that I won't leave the man (This point was raised by the man. Also, according to his mom, all the ex-girlfriends were bitches.)
  7. they've never worried that my naughty parts would impregnate someone else's naughty parts (see above comment about bitchy ex-girlfriends)
  8. I remind the man to call them on holidays and birthdays
  9. they get better presents when I pick them out
  10. I nag him so they don't have to

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