3.23.2009

10 years (pending)

My ten-year high school class reunion is fast approaching. It will take place this summer in my hometown. I come from a very small community and my graduating class consisted of 96 students, many of which were in my various "circles" of friends. I was a floater, a mingler, per se. I had friends in every cliche, had no specific tie to any particular group, and was a bit transient in general. As a result, perhaps, I have one close friend with whom I still communicate regularly. I cut loose all of the extraneous people from my life when I went away to college. Not because I didn't like them, but maybe because I hadn't forged real, sustainable connections with them.

It is these people whom I will be seeing this summer. I've run into old friends from time to time, but have never left those encounters with any promised contact. I hope to leave this reunion similarly unscathed, but possessing enough updated knowledge of my old friends to tide me over until the next reunion rolls around.

Why am I bringing this up? It has been on my mind lately. Am I who I wanted to be at the age of 27? Who did I want to be when I "grew up"? Did I meet those benchmarks? I don't know that I ever had set up a timeline of my life. Perhaps if I had, I would be disappointed now. I'd like to think that I'm on track and that I am right where I should be. That's how I feel, though I wouldn't mind tweaking a few aspects of my life. I prefer the "take it as it comes" guide to life - I strive for what I want, but what I want changes.

I guess I'm just looking at my life through a telescope. Trying to see the big picture. Trying to give the two-minute elevator conversation that explains who I am, how I got here, and who I want to become. I'd like to get a firm handle on that two minute "where am I now" so that I can leave people with a clear view of the real Trish. Except that in my mind, I can't really wrap my head around a reason to pinpoint my life like that.

I think I'm like one of those grab bags I used to love as a kid. You get a bag filled with surprises, some of them good, some of them you pass along to others. All in all, the grab bag of my life has been filled with a lot of great experiences who have made me into today's Trish. Tomorrow's Trish may be completely different. Who knows who I will have become by the time this summer's reunion comes around. Maybe I shouldn't write that elevator conversation down in pen, but rather just keep it in pencil. I guess I'm still that transient being I was in high school.

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