may 22, 2006: my dog is s-m-r-t

Names that the dog answers to:

• Jammer (only sometimes)
• Jeff Doucette
• Muffin
• Sweetness
• Jammerkins Snugglebutt
• Dogface
• Sugar
• Stupid
• Dog
• Jack
• Kitty

Words/commands/phrases the dog understands:

• Sit.
• Lay down.
• Get Jack.
• Get the Stick.
• Want a treat?
• Up.
• Get Nike.
• Get the Frisbee.
• Who's here?
• Do you have to go potty?
• Gotta poop?
• Want outside?
• Want to go for a walk?
• Want to go for a ride?
• Take it nice.

Things the dog only understands upstairs:

• Get the man.
• Get Trish.
• Want to go downstairs?
• Where's the kitty?

Things the dog doesn't understand, but (if the heavens shine upon us) will some day:

• No more human food.
• Stop breathing on me.
• Stop licking your naughties.
• Stop licking [Insert any random object here].
• Stay.
• No.
• Oh my god, please stop doing that.
• Wait.
• Get down. Get down. Get down.
• These are work clothes, you can't jump on me when I'm wearing these.
• Stop shedding.
• Don't leave Jammer tumbleweeds all over the floor.
• Roll over.
• Bring me the remote.
• Bring me a soda.
• Get the phone.
• Make me a sandwich.
• Stop eating Jack's food.
• Stop stinking.
• Pay the bills.
• Fill the car with gas.
• Do the laundry.